My nose needs more holes...!!!

Please someone bring me a drill because I need something to drill a hole in my nose so that maybe I can breathe!!! I CAN NOT BREATHE! I CAN NOT BREATHE...I CAN NOT BREATHE...SERIOUSLY...I have to keep laying my head down switching sides so that I can breathe a few mins out of both sides of my nose....!!!! I just wish there was something I could take...unfortunatley all I can take is saline solition nose spray which helps none...I might as well go outside to the water hose and spray it up my nose...that would give me the same effect as that damn saline spray!!!!